26.2 miles

i have said that this marathon was like my third baby and that may sound funny, but hear me out. the training is much like pregnancy in the sense that your body is changing and doing things you didn't know possible. then race day or your due date comes and you are full of emotion, anticipation, until the first contraction, or you cross the starting line. its go time, you get in the zone. focused. then at about mile 18 for me was what in labor they call "transition" i started thinking maybe i could call in for a sub or trying to think about taking a break or getting some pain relief, but no. my phone died which was my music & pacer so my rhythm was off and i was aware that i was still running and into uncharted territory, a distance i had yet to achieve. Then i hit mile 20 which was a hill that lasted for the next two miles. Justin jumped in and began running with me, my couch in labor & life and i will note that just like when i was in labor he remained rather silent only to pop in with a word of encouragement ever so often, but not to much knowing that being there was enough. then the end was in sight, but i was tiered and still brainstorming of ideas like, maybe if Justin carries me for a bit i won't lose to much time or where is that bike he was riding earlier in the race, it wouldn't be bad to just ride a few miles. then the 25mile sign arrives and its like when the doctor or midwife tell you, okay you are going to have this baby just push... so i pushed and crossed the finish line with a smile on my face and joy in my heart knowing that i am fearfully & wonderfully made. I did it! I finished! I won my race. 

I have a new respect for my body. Having two babies gave me that respect too; the fact that i was able to grow and hold another human within my body, the body i was born with and then give birth to a baby and then fed the baby, with my body, wow! So i saw fit the challenge for my body to achieve another great feet and it succeed, it ran the race... 

26.2 miles in 4 hours and 13 minutes.

a few highlights from the race:

•  mile 6 when i saw my husband ride by me on his bike & then along side me for the next few miles
• mile 10 when i was cheered on by my brother Josh, his wife Jessica and my niece Esther. My sweet sister-in-law cheered with tears & got me all choked up too
• mile 13 when my Dad shouted encouragement (took me back to childhood athletics)
• mile 14 when my kids saw me, Lillian ran with me a few paces, Justin held Rowen & ran with me so they each could give me a high five... they were beaming
• mile 20 when my husband showed up running next to me and i said, "my phone died"... i was a ship without a sail. he plugged his into my cord & paced with me for the next 6 miles
• mile 23 coming up the last hill and seeing my mom, dad, brother Josh with Lillian on his shoulders and my sister-in-law Jessica with Rowen in her arms, "Go Katrina! Go Mommy! Good job! You got this!"
• mile 25 when i gave it my all
• mile 26.2 the finish line
• and then i grabbed a lot of free food & drinks, wobbled into the waiting area and was embraced by my mom, sister-law and husband. then i laid down on the pavement, smiling.

a few words to describe how i feel about finishing a marathon: accomplished, proud, challenged, honored, motivated, athletic, strong, amazed, relieved, happy, encouraged, grateful

later on that night my kids each said things to me that i will never forget.

Rowen: Mommy i want you to run a marathon AGAIN, that was SO fun.

Lillian: Mommy, how come God made me faster then some adults?

sharing is...

caring, right? well i love to share & just wanted to insert a few links...

1. we had an amazing Seckel family photo shoot and if you would like to peek at the pictures, check out the Bostrom Blog it was delightful to be together and have someone capture our moments.
2. our church that we are plugging into here in SD has been a HUGE blessing in to many ways to count, but they have a tool on their website that allows you to take a test to evaluate your God given gifts, talents and abilities. it is worth a few minutes of your time and i pray you are encourage to see your results: Solana Beach Presbyterian
3. just starting to read some really good books and although i am not finished they are really good... so if you are looking for a summer read Bread & Wine, Freefall to Fly and the devotional Jesus Calling (& i am now going to buy the for kids one)
4. last my wonderful husband bought me this cute little Q&A a day book for my birthday and we are going through it day by day to write our answers together. it has been really fun & i am all for little things that make husband & wife life, well better.

*click on the BOLD print & it will take you to each link

rowen dean

there is a fire in his soul

 a lamp that burns all night

 a passion for life that makes his world light up

 he is a builder

 a maker

 the pilot to his planes

 the conductor to his trains

 the engineer to his tracks

 the driver to his cars

the beat to his own drum

 his laugh is a heavenly roar

his dimple is like a wink of cuteness on his cheek

 i love this boy like i never knew possible

 his isms and ideas of how he wants things to go

 stop me in my tracks 

this little person has BIG plans.

 

 awake or asleep, happy or sad, frustrated or elated, calm or wild...

 I LOVE YOU.

(can't believe he is 3)

98.

my grandpa bob has been in heaven a year now
 after living 98 long, strong and faithful years on earth.
i found my notes from his memorial recently and am flooded with fondness for this strong and often mysterious man that i loved to make smile...

As i began reflecting on my grandpa's life i found myself naming the fruits of the spirit to describe him. Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self- control. Being in my grandpa's presence was peaceful, he was never in a rush, always had time and was always on time. He was gentle as he would rest on the couch i remember jumping up on his lap & wanting to play on his knee- he would awake & joyfully play with me. He chose patience as a hobby... Fishing, hiking, golfing, crabbing, gardening, things that took time, made you wait. His life was about the journey not the destination. i loved gardening with him as a kid & learning how things grew. I vividly remember pulling my first carrot out of the dirt, in his vegetable garden. He had amazing self- control as he arose early daily, he did his exercises, devotionals, ate breakfast with my grandma  (eating the same burnt toast with peanut butter  & prunes :). I am so grateful for the vivid memories I have of his morning routine. 

The last 10 years I got to know a new side of my grandpa. When he met my husband Justin, he went from a man of few words to a man of many. There mutual love for the northwest and growing up in the great state of WA, allowed me to see my grandpa's true passion & love in life. He was a man of adventure that blazed across WA. Our summer on Orcas Island with both my grandparents was there last visit together and the only time I have ever beat him in scrabble. I will treasure those memories forever. Having my daughter at Swedish Hospital where he & my mom were born. And then having him visit me after Lillian was born, which was his last time in WA. BLESS HIS HEART! I am reminded of him daily as I live in WA, amidst all things he loved, and that made him who he was. 

although a year later i do not live in washington, thinking about my grandpa reminds me that i will always have a piece of my heart in the great state. here are a few pictures of a camping trip we took this past summer to Dungeness Bay in Sequim, WA where my grandparents lived while I was growing up. it was a bit of a memorial and treasure to impart a special place to our kids. my brother Jared and I scattered some of his ashes into the Strait of Juan de Fuca. i love you grandpa and am so grateful that i can rest assured you are in heaven with your savior.

 

oh mother...

 most days i wake up to the words, "mom, mommy?" 

... and i can not believe that these little ones are talking to me. seriously. 

they are so cute. they are so sweet. they are so overwhelming. they are so playful.

 they are so bold. they are heavenly. they are so huggable, kissable, almost edible. 

they are so demanding. they are so loving and affectionate. they are so precious.

 they are so loud. they are so charming. they are so funny. 

they are so small and yet i always think how big they are getting. 

they are so enchanting. they are so faithful. they are honest. they are so amazing. 

they are my kids and i love that they call me, mom.

 thank you for making my life as your mom so sweet. 

i love you lillian and rowen with all my heart. 

thank you justin for making mother's day so special, so simple, so thoughtful, so sweet.

you are life's greatest gift & i savor my moments with you.
xoxo

today

this past year has taught me to be. to soak it all in and live in the moment. be that i have not known what tomorrow would hold has brought me to deep gratitude for right now. mothers of grown children are always telling me, "this time goes by so fast" or "they are all grown up before you know it" and "this is the best time of your life"... well then i am going to treasure it, marvel in their little greatnesses, and be thankful for days like today that are SO good, in the simplest way.

623

we talked, we prayed, we ran, we mulled, we biked, we talked, we prayed, we sought an answer to the stirring in our souls and one year ago we decided to sell our house.  our house was our first, our fixer-up-er, and the walls were painted with our own hands (inside & out). rowen was born there, lillian learned to walk there, our little family filled it with memories, grew and then out grew.  i felt like we were standing on the edge of a cliff and everything hinged on our decision to jump or turn around and make peace with the land we stood on...we turned around a few steps and then took a running start as we leaped!

our house sold in 3 short days with a few offers and for higher than asking price. by june 1 we were out of our home at 623 in Seattle

THEN up to camano island we went and for the next six months we hiked, we biked, we ran, we connected, we drank latte's, made fires, soaked in the sound, explored, had friends & family come to stay, celebrated Lillian's 4th, spent quality family time, enjoyed the greats and the grandparents,  lost my grandma & grandpa to heaven, hugged great grandma a lot before she left too, swam, whitnessed an AZ haboob, talked, watched tv, played games, choo-choo bobby, stayed at the cabin on Big Lake, kayaked, boated, tubed, water skied, camped at Cama Beach, collected treasures, crabbed, vacationed in Whistler, drove to Seattle, bible studied, grew up, slowed down, saw deer, skipped rocks,  watched fireworks, resorted in AZ & SD, mission bay, rented a car, pool time, first family vacay with friends, Lake Chelan, laughed, laid out, picked berries, stand-up paddle boarded, Portland, met baby Jacob, camped Dungeness Bay, visited Sequim, rode the ferry, watched the sunset, rode horses, became horse lovers, lived large in small ways, country living, wide open spaces, ran thru the woods, trail blazed, mowed the lawn, and soaked in the things we love most about the Pacific Northwest.

i am so thankful for that rich season of life that i never would of imagined. i love that life is a mystery and that our future is in Gods hands because although at times i think it might be better to know all...its really a gift that we don't and that only God does. i have enough on my plate being grateful and a good steward of today. thankful for the day i had the strength to leap & pray that daily i know the action best suited.

a year later...

i can NOT believe that a whole year has passed by since i last documented here. i have so much to say, share and reflect on to bring this space up to speed. this last year has been full of movement, emotion, endings, beginnings, bliss, milestones, and a lot of faith... a year ago tomorrow we made the decision to sell our house and quite frankly change our life. more of that story another day, but today here are the two that a whole year is a lot of their life and i am smitten to be the one they call MOM!

 a few words about rowen: adorable, daring, bugs, jet planes, dadada (superman), cool, shades, dimple, smile, futbol, strider, jump, cuddly, cautious,determined, choo-choo, focused, laughter, and he said, "you best ever!"

a few words about lillian: beautiful, loving, thoughtful, friendly, observant, sissy, horse rider, little mama, fashionista, encouraging, bright, monet, runner, legs, faithful, and she said, "when i told God i was nervous about being 5, He said, 'it's okay i will always be by your side'"

cheers to the road less traveled!

happy new year!

only 4 months late and a season shy of summer, i am finally welcoming in the new year. the last few months have been filled with beauty and bliss, but not without a bit of snow and rain. with my heart on my sleeve and my littles by my side, i have taken each day in stride. these photo's below sum up my moments of peace and awestruck glory of God.

 trail 100 :: arizona

 la jolla shores :: "sand-iego"-Lillian

 scripps beach :: la jolla

sunset park :: seattle

 first kiss :: camano island

seaview public access :: puget sound

seward park :: "this is spectacular"- Lillian

seattle's TWO year old :: birthday boy

"Our children in our hand are not there to mold, but to unfold into God's plan."- Greg Laurie

thankful

 this was one of the best thanksgivings ever. i have so much to be thankful for! my kids are healthy, adorable, happy, animated, engaging and loving. my husband is amazing and i am madly in love with him, want to spend all my time with him and can't get enough of him... still. my in-laws and husband's whole extended family are wonderful. i have 5 cute nieces, 3 handsome nephews, 3 sister-in laws i call friends, 3 brothers i admire and two charming parents. our little house is in a wonderful neighborhood where we have made some life long friends. really, there is enough good that i can let it out weigh the bad because it is the BIG things that are so good right now.

 ALSO

i ran my first half marathon! it was cold, wet and windy and i honestly loved it. i cried as i ran through downtown (mile 1), tears of joy, kind of silly. my husband, kids and his best friend Ben found me 3 times during the race to cheer me on, plus carry the kids to run beside me for a second. i felt amazing and finished in 1hour and 55 minutes! lillian is the greatest cheerleader & loved my medal :)

one more: crazy driver

i dont want to forget this moment & i meant to post it in the lil quotes, but here it is:

I was driving in the car & this low rider car whips out in front of me. 

Me: "Goodness! Crazy driver!"

Lillian: "What mom?"

Me: "Oh this guy is just being a crazy driver"

Lillian: " What is a crazy driver?"

Me: "Well he was going fast and not looking around, he could get in an accident."

Lillian: "Were you a crazy driver in your accident?"

Me: "Hmm, no that was an actual accident when you don't do something on purpose..."

she is too smart.

my kids weren't in the car during my fender bender "accident", but lillian was so glad when i got the cars "owie" fixed. she asked me what color the car was that hit me and when i said, "red", she was so worried, "did you get in an accident with auntie carly?", no someone else's red car.

she said...

i love lillian! 

she fills my days with conversation and constantly keeps me watching what i say. here are a few quotable phrases from lil:

7am Lillian crawls into our bed. Justin leaves to go to the bathroom. Lillian says, 

"Is Daddy coming back? Cause you need your husband. I am going to have some alone time watching my show, so you will need your husband. Is he coming back?"

Prayers:

"Dear God please give Rowen peace. Like a piece of wood or maybe a piece of gum. Amen"

"Dear God thank you for Mommy and Daddy and Lillian and Rowen and Lillian and Mommy and Lillian"

October 30, 2011:

"When I wake up I'm going to yell 'SURPRISE'!"

Me: Why?

"Because it's almost Christmas!" (duh Mom:)

Little Mama:

"Minnie look in my eyes. Look in Mama's eyes. No hitting. No! Mom Minnie isn't listening to me!"

"Dad why don't you just take your SON with you? Take him with you Daddy." 

(Rowen was crying cause Justin was leaving)

My girl:

"Do you have something to tell me Mom?"

Me: I love you!

"No. Something else."

Me: You are the cutest girl in the whole wide world?

"No..."

Me: I missed you?

"And you dreamed about me ALL night long!"

Girl Time:

Lillian LOVES girl time and observes whenever it is just girls!  I managed not to LOL at our last in prompt to "girl time" when she very EXCITED said,

"We are having girl time Mommy! Just us girls and we both have vagina's!"

Princess:

"Daddy I am your princess & you are the Beast!"

"Rowen hold my hand! You are my prince, you have to hold my hand!"

Details:

"Mommy look she is so glitzy" (a lady in TJ)

Lillian is one of the most engaging and sweet three year olds I have ever chatted with. I know that I am biased, but her empathy amazes me. She remembers every detail. She gives compliments daily, "I like your boots mommy", "you look pretty mama", "good job mama, we are amazing!" She is the house cheerleader and my best girl friend. I love my lil!

cyclocross

my husband has joined the cyclocross series and therefore so have we (me & the littles). we have spent our sundays for the last few months cheering, "go daddy go!" as he pedals past on his single speed (or runs with his bike). we are so proud and to be honest i am kind of an intense cheerleader, which i validate by considering myself his coach :). the best part about our sundays at cyclocross is the KIDS RACE! lillian is convinced we go for her now & loves her race. she rides her strider, but i must note that she does ride her big girl bike withOUT training wheels now (she is a pretty big deal & so is biking).

Rowen is a trouper & points out every time Justin rides by.